I had a breakthrough today while interviewing an expert for an article Iím writing about the trend of more women choosing to have kids without partners. My source mentioned that often women grieve breakups not necessarily because of the loss of a partner, but because of the loss of having a family.
Bells started ringing in my mind and I wondered if she was talking about women just like me. What if itís not E that I miss so much as the idea of having a family?
If I were a guy, Iíd travel forever, have dozens of passionate flings, and not settle down until I was 45 with a woman ten years my junior.
But Iím not a guy. Iím on a tighter schedule because my fertility wonít last forever. And all this would be so much easier to handle if I could imagine feeling fulfilled without children. But my instinct tells me that my life wonít feel complete without being a mom. Iím definitely not ready to have babies right nowóthe thought scares the hell out of me! But the mere fact that Iím female forces me to think about it. I want the security of knowing a child will be in my life someday. Is peace of mind too much to ask?